Attorney, Interrupted
mentalibrium,
an origin story.Act 2. Into the Hospital
After 17 years as an attorney, the passion had dissipated. What I used to love about my job, I found exhausting. Oddly, I had started to feel overwhelmed by the 100s of emails, endless conference calls and increasing expectations I had once considered invigorating. I was sad that the only time I could complete work was at night when I was supposed to be with my family. As a result of this shift,
the yummy corporate kool-aid that had previously made my work enjoyable,
now tasted a little sour.
I took some time to settle into the unfamiliar discomfort I was experiencing.
Eventually, I realized I was at the end of that path.
It was a scary reality for me. My company, my colleagues and my career were MY IDENTITY. If I stepped out of that, who would I be? Would I be important? Would I have a purpose?
So, I did the obvious thing that any middle-aged person would do, I went back to college! Yikes!
Let me add some context.
During times in my life when I needed support figuring things out, a therapist helped me more than I can express and I decided I wanted to help people in the same way. Pivot! I earned my masters in social work with the intention of becoming a mental health therapist.
Throughout my studies about mental health, my brain continually applied mental health skills to my corporate experience. I remember thinking, “geez, I wish I knew these back then!”
Once I graduated, I worked at a behavioral health hospital as a therapist teaching patients mental health skills to improve their lives. I worked with patients in their most vulnerable state and was honored to be a part of their mental health journeys. I was privileged to work with first responders, active military, and veterans who struggled with PTSD. I used trauma therapy and witnessed the recovery and success of patients in our care.
I realized our patients were the same as me, my family, my friends, my colleagues. Like me, they struggled with managing relationships, negative thoughts, understanding emotions, coping with life’s challenges. Like me, they needed tools to help them navigate.
I reflected about myself from Act 1 and considered these mental health skills I was teaching patients. I wondered if I had used them, would I have burned out so early? Could I have done it differently and sustained my professional and personal life?
Maybe.
This question prompted me to dive into the research about burnout, stress, and mental health. The research is staggering and led me to terms like “The Great Resignation,” “toxic corporate culture,” and “quiet quitting.”
The research shows we are in a mental health CRISIS and employees are desperate for mental health support in the workplace.
The research indicates employers don’t have a solution. But why?
Therapy in the workplace might be a conflict of interest.
It’s too expensive to offer therapy to all employees.
The belief that there is not a mental health problem at the organization.
Talking about mental health might lead to complaints, accommodations or liability.
Employee Assistance Programs only offer a limited number of therapy sessions, which are typically engaged for a challenge specific to the employee and not necessarily transferable to the workplace.
Major medical covers mental health, but there is a shortage of therapists and waitlists are long.
The truth is that employees and leaders must use mental health skills proactively, BEFORE they are in crisis or burnout; BEFORE employees are disengaged; BEFORE the culture becomes toxic. And if they don’t use mental health skills before a crisis, there is still time DURING and AFTER.
I know what it’s like. Let’s go back to where I started.
Act 1. Dedicated Attorney.
I was successful in my career as a senior attorney and executive working for a respected financial services company. I loved my job and truly enjoyed my clients. I worked diligently to accomplish the business needs and gave everything I had to my work. I was motivated. I was determined. I had grit.
My alarm went off at 4, I was on the train by 5, and at my desk at 6 when the east coast was starting their day at 8!
My professional goal was to climb the ladder and to “be in the room where it happened.” (Any Hamilton fans?) I asked for more opportunities and received them because I was trusted to work very hard to learn the skills I needed for each responsibility or promotion. I had institutional knowledge because I grew up in the company. My colleagues felt like my family. I also had a couple of great friends who knew the real me.
I drank the corporate kool-aid,
poured it for others
and toasted to success!
I also pridefully collected badges of honor.
“I had 3 weeks of unused PTO this year!” Badge.
“I worked while on vacation!” Badge.
“I slept 2 hours last night and finished that project!” Badge.
“I took an international call at 1 AM!” Badge.
“I answered emails until midnight!” Badge.
“I traveled 12 weeks straight!” Badge.
I’d leave the office around 5, arrive home around 6:30 and start my nighttime routine because I was an engaged mom of littles. I knew their friends, teachers, and activities. We played games, read books, and snuggled. I went on field trips and attended holiday parties. I was present with my kids. And also, I would have my computer open on the counter while I was cooking dinner and would take calls at night when necessary. Multi-tasking! Badge.
I loved the sprint of my career until I lost momentum. That was an unfamiliar feeling.
[This is when Act 2 happened.]
Act 3. Solving a Huge Organizational Problem.
Let’s go back to that behavioral health hospital and the collision of ideas and insights from my old life and new life. What I came to realize is that corporate offices are like behavioral health hospitals in their own way. People of different ages, backgrounds, experiences, but all similarly lacking requisite mental health skills.
Here’s what I understand about mental unwellness:
1) It is a bigger problem than people realize.
2) Ignoring the symptoms doesn't make the problem go away.
3) People may not know how to help themselves.
4) There aren’t enough therapists for one-on-one care.
The moment of inspirational inception happened when the following questions kept popping into my head.
What if employees could LEARN mental health skills in the workplace?
What if those employees who learned skills to handle an unsettled client in a healthy way could go home and USE those same skills with their 10-year old who is similarly unsettled?
What if those employees could TEACH their 10-year old the same mental health skills to help him manage his emotions?
What if EMPLOYERS are the solution to mental unwellness?
Mentalibrium is an organization that brings mental health skills to organizations, both proactively and reactively; in large groups, small groups and individually. Many workplace challenges, struggles, and conflicts can be prevented or resolved using mental health skills.
My corporate experience, as an employment attorney, a litigator, and a business leader combined with my training and experience as a therapist, has now placed me in the unique position to serve as the trusted advisor to businesses, to enter organizations and teach their work-family how to get along, regulate, communicate, and respect.
Won’t it be great when your company embraces mental health skills?